Hi once again good people. The foundation of this title was my recent experience during my visit to Nigeria. It has been the fast growing trends in the workplace to have everyone address each other by first names. Under the pressure of wanting to conform to the laissez-faire American way of doing things which is now in fashion, a particularly visible aspect of the American culture has been appropriated and transplanted into the Nigerian workplace scenery.

In France, you do not say “tu” (”you” singular) to a superior or someone you are not on familiar terms with. You use the plural form of “you” which is “vous”. In Germany, you do not use the familiar singular pronoun “du” until you have been specifically invited to do so. Until then, you use the more formal “sie”. And we think white men don’t have respect?! They do! And how they show it depend on their peculiar upbringing and culture. How Nigerians show theirs depends equally on how they are brought up to perceive reality and conform to it. How do you convince an authentic Yoruba man (a tribe in Nigeria) that you have any regard for him when you insist on “first-naming” him even though he is your superior; and that without his consent? Even if he accepts it intellectually, his internal syntax or personal protocol will rebel against this blatant affront to his cultural values. The sort of reaction he will display in consequence may be overt or covert; in either case, it will most probably be detrimental to the interpersonal relationships of those concerned and ultimately to the organization.

Disgruntled personnel “don`t complain” because to do that will be incurring the wrath of the “piper`s payer” as those that pay the piper call the tune; yet, organization cannot imagine the cost of the inter-personal conflicts they have given birth to which frustrates true synergy and team related work. I know some of Nigerian have the foreign exposure (or should I say foreign hypnotism) to manage new realities and this is okay. I do too. However, if I prefer to be addressed by my first name as CEO, age notwithstanding, then that is what I need for my personal peace, creativity and balance; it is a privilege I have chosen to extend to the people around me. It will however be wrong to force these personal preferences on every other person within the organization simply because you are TOP MANAGEMENT! I think this is a wrong leadership model and an oppressive and tyrannical display of emotional imbalance.

When it comes to fostering cohesion, synergy and teaming, there can be no greater limitation than that which comes from not allowing team members to be part of a decision that will govern the way they work or live. As long as there are employees who feel abused and caged by our unethical policies and procedures, the system is incomplete.